The World Without Albany, NY

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Or as we call it around here, Smallbany.

Yes, I reside in our titular city. I have most of my life. We don’t have the glamor of Los Angeles, the thrill of New Orleans, or the sleaze of Philadelphia, but we’ve got…umm, other stuff. In this article, we’ll explore this great city’s absence further.

So, without further ado, in a world without Albany…

…America Wouldn’t Exist

Before you scoff, just remember that one of the 56 signers of the Declaration of Independence was a cat named Philip Livingston, who happened to be an Albany native. Without him, were those other 55 white guys really going to sign the paper? My imagination says no…

Independence Hall in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. The Founding Fathers sit around debating stuff.

Samuel Adams: Pass me another Cold Snap.

Benjamin Franklin: Somebody cut that guy off. And where the hell is Livingston?

Thomas Jefferson: Late. He’s coming from Albany. 87 is brutal this time of day.

Benjamin Franklin: That’s the city with the Empire State Plaza buildings that look like a bunch of radiators, right?

Benjamin Rush: Those don’t exist yet. And neither does I-87. Now are we gonna sign this thing or what? I gotta rush…